Chris Dorner Jokes

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I think that it’s time to share a few thoughts on the late Chris Dorner, disgraced and terminated Los Angeles Police Officer, assassin of innocent young ladies, ambush murder of fellow police officers. 

Since Dorner will be long forgotten while this blog still floats in cyberspace, I wanted to preface it properly (above).

Today, accused ambush murderer, Dorner murdered again in an exchange of gunfire with San Bernardino County Deputy Sheriffs. SWAT arrived, set up and had broken down windows, fired tear gas into the cabin and blasted over a loud speaker urging Dorner to surrender. When they got no response, police deployed a vehicle to rip down the walls of the cabin “one by one, like peeling an onion,” a law enforcement official said.
By the time they got to the last wall, authorities heard a single gunshot, the source said. Then flames began to spread through the structure, and gunshots, probably set off by the fire, were heard. 
As darkness descended on the mountainside, Dorner’s body was found, well charred.
Joke #1
Chris Dorner dies and ascends to meet his reward. A Black Devil meets him as he floats in mid air a thousand feet over the San Bernardino Mountains and the community of Angeles Oaks where he’d just murdered a San Bernardino County Deputy Sheriff.

The Black Devil says, “Yo ah’m here ta take you down ta hell, what the fuck sup now?”

Dorner, looking down and apparently moved by what he’s seeing replies, “Wait, look at all of those officers surrounding the house that I set on fire before I shot myself in the head. They have formed a circle with their heads down. They’re forgiving me.”

“Yo dey’re not forgiving you, foo’ Ya’ know what I’m sayin’? Yo dey’re cooking marshmellows on yo’ carcass you know das right!”

Joke #2

Chris Dorner shoots himself in the head and is transported to a door. Immediately in front of the door is a uniformed Riverside Police Sergeant sitting at a desk. The door is frosted glass and on the glass the logo of the Riverside Police Department has been etched in gold.
Dormer speaks, “Let me axe you a question, homes. Where is this?”
Sergeant, “This is the White Riverside Police Officer’s Heaven.”
Dormer questions further, “Why that’s racist!”
Sergeant, “Not at all. Other ethnicities have their own heavens. This one is for the white veterans of the Riverside Police Department, and (the door swings open) they’ve asked for you to live with them for all eternity.” 
Officer Michael Crain, ambushed and murdered by Dorner, appears at the door. “Come on in Chris. We’ve been waiting for you.”
Dorner demands his rights, “Yo Wait. If it’s heaven I wants uh harp. I gots muh motha fuckin rights!
Officer Crain explains, “We have a harp for you, but I don’t think that you’re going to like where we’re going to put it.”
In the Summer of 2001, the United States Department of Justice (DOJ) placed the Los Angeles Police Department under a consent decree that forced it to change some of its operating guidelines. Among those changes were demands that the Police Department hire more people of color. 
Because they found it difficult to do that in sufficient numbers to satisfy the Federal Government, the standards that applied to hiring applicants, such as Dorner, were lowered including the psychological testing standards. The Federal Government felt that if larger numbers of ethnic people entered the department, all would be unicorns and rainbows. Sadly, lowering standards is never a good thing.

DOJ recognized that the overwhelming majority of Los Angeles police officers perform their difficult jobs in a lawful manner. The City denied the allegations in the DOJ complaint and entered into negotiations with DOJ. However, to avoid potentially divisive and costly litigation and to promote the best available practices and procedures for the Department, the City entered into the Civil Rights Consent Decree.

Thus, where does the blame go for wingnuts such as Dorner entering public service go? One place that we should look first is to the Federal Government.

16 thoughts on “Chris Dorner Jokes

  1. Chris Dorner fans hailed him as another Crispus Attucks, but he wound up with crispy buttocks.

  2. Same way the feds (Dems) passed laws allowing mortgage loans with no supportive paperwork proving income. Makes no sense, and ends up biting all of us in the end.

  3. Dormer will be all but forgotten by all but his victims families. He was just one more 'entitled minority' who decided to kill people who he felt should have honored him for being black. But yes, he ended up being 'blackened' even further by the San Bernardino Sheriff's SWAT Team.

    [for those who want to know: Attucks was half Wampanoag Indian and half African Negro (sort of like Obama) who was killed by the British Army at the Boston Massacre.]

  4. Same thing – same sort of results.

    It makes you yearn for limited government and support for wisdom in high places. Yes, it's a vain hope.

  5. Did u know Dorner was Catholic? Early this morning the cabin fire was finally put out. It looks like Dorner stopped smoking for Lent!!!

  6. The DOJ forced a similar decree on Atlantic City, NJ, wherein there will be two promotions lists, one for everybody and one for CERTAIN minorities. Oh, and the CERTAIN minorities will be on both lists…

    Result: More Lieutenants than Sergeants…and lots of new positions to get CERTAIN people of rank off the streets where they can get people hurt.

  7. Better that they closet those certain people, pay them to swill coffee and give them awards for doing nothing. At least they are not a danger to the public that they serve.

  8. LAPD held the outer perimeter. That was a San Bernardino Sheriff's show – pyrotechnics and all. Dorner had every chance to surrender but chose to go out in a blaze of — carbon.

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