Sunday Sermonette: Toxic Purge

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Since I am currently homeless (the WWM project just sunk its fangs into another $110K of my money last Friday) and living alternately with this and that adult daughter (and their families), my daughters each have solutions to “fix me”.
Amanda, husband and my youngest
grandson at Disneyland yesterday
Yes I’m getting old, or perhaps I am old? And I take medication to keep myself alive… but they feel that I can be fixed. My body can be repaired, much like an old Ford left rusting in a field.
Both older daughters are heavily into homeopathic solutions and I’m not saying that they’re wrong. It’s just that the witches’ brew that they want me to drink have a less than perfect reaction. I have explained cause and effect. They consult books.
“But Dad, your liver is possibly toxic and needs to be purged.” The argument has merits. I suspect that some of my fellow bloggers may also have toxic livers, but am no more willing to turn my daughters loose on you than Fredd is disposed to feed you food made by his Aunt Sally.
I suggested a liver transplant but the girls argue, “You don’t know where that liver has been”. Full disclosure, the MD that I go to says that my liver is fine. The girls, thrilled to “practice medicine”, have volumes, written by people that I’ve never heard of suggest otherwise. 
Thus, I lend my body to science and their tinkering with chemistry. Not all scientists are mad and I have to admit that coming out the other side like Frankenstein (possibly the Mel Brooks variety) has advantages over the current state of affairs… particularly at Halloween. People have told me, “LL, you don’t need a mask to scare children.” All well and good.
I suggest that the purgatives could also be taken by my son-in-law (above). My daughter tearfully explains that he has refused her amateur medical treatments to date. This tells me that he’s a lot smarter than I am.

28 thoughts on “Sunday Sermonette: Toxic Purge

  1. That homeopathic stuff always has its proponents: take a little eye of newt, wart of toad, maybe a pinch of wolfbane, throw it into some stump water, chug it down and wait for the miracles to come.

    No need to seek out a coven for those ingredients, my Aunt Sally has all of that stuff molderin' away in her pantry, just waiting for company…..

  2. The fact it the wonder supplements are over the counter at the local health food store is no guarantee they won't mess you up.
    Was just reading about some poor sod in decent health who apparently wrecked his liver taking green tea supplements…

  3. My response is to say how much is warms my heart that they care. I also point out that I have been living in this body for 60+ years, and do have some idea of what makes is tick.

    I rather like Terrence Hill's delivery in the movie "My Name Is Nobody" of the line "If the spirit is willing, the flesh hath the strength of ten!".

    So, keep the faith, don't play on the freeway, and consume some form of roast beast whenever the mood strikes you.

  4. There are as many health promotions as there are people who can read and are interested. Who is right, and who is wrong?

    Personally, I've been using 10 drops per day of food grade hydrogen peroxide in a beverage. Also use it on scaly skin patches. Hurts like hell for twenty minutes but not much more so than the liquid nitrogen treatment at the doctor's office. As a fair skin Celt who can get a sunburn from a 100 Watt light bulb, skin cancer is always a risk.

  5. I tend to stick to "FDA Approved" treatments. Had some friends, and my sister, who got genuinely ill from too many vitamins, too much fish oil, and too much other "natural" stuff.

  6. If it doesn't kill you, it might make you stronger. Only you can gauge how something makes you feel. If it doesn't hurt anything, why not. You are the ultimate judge, not your daughters.

  7. I've always wondered about that statement.
    Many people survive stuff weakened permanently.
    Gunshot wounds come to mind.

  8. Be thankful that your kids, misguided as they may be, care for your health and well-being.
    Then again, I've got plans to make a killing opening a homeopathic restaurant! Buy a few steak bones, a few veggies, some seasoning. Make a real nice stock, then start thinning it out like the homeopathic medicine is done. Same with tea and coffee. If it works for curing ailments, why won't the same idea provide enough nutrition for the body…
    Stay safe and warm, can't wait till you're able to move into your new digs…
    Wandering Neurons

  9. You can always purge whatever from your system, so long as you draw breath. I don't recommend it, though.

  10. My girls have a lot of books full of advice. The problem is that you never know if the author was a maniac.

  11. They do care, there's a lot of love. But I'm with you in that I've been wearing this skin for 62 years and understand what causes the fan belt to break.

  12. For the most part, I too go with traditional medicine, but I don't discount the value of some homeopathic solutions.

  13. Cube, I cut out the "cures" and feel better. The only reason that I tried them was because my beloved daughters advocated them.

  14. Wandering: Sound advice and I sense a business opportunity. Remember, FRANCHISE your health solutions.

  15. I take all kinds of vitamins, supplements and industrial quantities of red wine. And it's weird but I find myself growing more and more MAGA, as if that was possible. But that's just me.

    You're very brave to go to Disneyland.

    Noted in Dispatches.

  16. Being mentioned in dispatches is a significant honor. Receiving a gong for my bravery (a ribbon with an enamel mouse head on it) in action in Disneyland is coveted.

  17. >I suspect that some of my fellow bloggers may also have toxic livers

    The problem isn't when you've had 10 drinks one evening. The problem is when you aren't hung over the next day. Or as we say, "Boy, is my liver INDUCED." (Meaning it's been conditioned to optimize its function to breaking down ethanol and aldehydes. This takes serious training to achieve.) Er, or so I'm told.

  18. Yep! It definitely sounds like you have legit California girls. Who needs real drugs when you can concoct a witches brew?

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