Alligator Alcatraz
It’s an example of amazing branding attached to a great idea. The name has it all: pleasing alliteration, a reference to a famous prison that all Americans are familiar with, and the vivid, evocative mental image it creates. As in, “You thought the Rock was a tough place to escape from?” At least there, if you made it out and could survive the swim, you’d find yourself in San Francisco. Sure, that’s not the reward that it might have been, decades ago. But still, if you stepped carefully through the human feces and filthy syringes, and could avoid getting bitten by a shambling, zombie-fied, narcotics-addled, straight-ballot Democrat voter, you’d soon be free.
But Alligator Alcatraz? If you manage to make it out of there, you’d be facing miles of uncharted swamps, filled with animals whose bite is even more terrifying than that of a hepatitis-riddled leftist with meth mouth. I’m talking about an apex predator from the age of the dinosaurs, with a mouth as big as Maxine Waters’ and skin as tough and scaly as… Maxine Waters. (Would somebody please pull that nasty wig off her head?)
Many soft-hearted lefties have pronounced themselves appalled and offended by the cruelty of conservatives who would subject the “undocumented” to such a place, and would even give it a hilarious name like “Alligator Alcatraz.” Since very few of them have expressed any regret or shame over Pedo Joe Biden’s open-border-enabled rape and murder of Jocelyn Nungaray, Laken Riley, or the myriad victims of illegal aliens’ violence, we are not going to lose any sleep over their bruised feelings.
Gov. DeSantis has released a helpful list of some of the delightful illegals whom Biden and the Dems invited into our country, and who are now at Alligator Alcatraz. These Citizen-of-the-Year candidates include a Cuban convicted of sexual assault in Texas; a Honduran convicted of murder in Florida; a Guatemalan convicted of burglary, forced entry, and voyeurism in Miami. Another Cuban slit the throat of an old woman and then tried to burn her house down to destroy the evidence. This group is like a United Nations gathering of terrible human beings. (Coincidentally, many UN committees are a United Nations gathering of terrible human beings. I hope Trump has got a team looking at the process for pulling out of the UN ASAP.)
My favorite scumbag on the first list of detainees at AA – and one I hope will soon prove his machismo by trying his luck in the swamp – is a Honduran MS-13 member with a string of charges including assault, resisting arrest, RICO offenses and conspiracy to commit murder, called – and I swear I am not making this up – Oscar “Satan” Sanchez. That’s who the Democrats are fighting for. Drug traffickers, sex traffickers, human traffickers, gang bangers, wife-beaters like Cuddly Kilmar, and Satan!
Would the governor authorize pay-per-view gladiator-style cage matches featuring the worst-of-the-worst in Alligator Alcatraz, who are willing to get into the octagon with a gator, with a guarantee of freedom if they win? Pres. Trump is already friends with the MMA’s Dana White and Joe Rogan. White can set up the matches, and Rogan can call them. We can allocate the proceeds from the pay-per-view, which should generate as much revenue as the tariffs, toward hiring more ICE and Border Patrol agents.
I can see it now. A huge gator wriggles into the cage, while a graphics package lists his stats: Length, 13 feet. Weight, 1000 pounds. Number of teeth: 80. Bite strength: 2,125 PSI. Record: 37-0 – 33-0 vs foreign criminals, 2-0 vs. dull-witted tourists taking selfies, 2-0 vs oblivious poodles.
Then Satan Sanchez struts in, and his stats are listed: Height: 5’9”, Weight: 185, Record: 9-1 – 3-0 vs children, 4-0 vs women, 2-0 vs senior citizens. One loss to an ICE agent using the Gender Confirmation Protocol (groin kick) followed by pepper spray. Life Expectancy: 2 more minutes.
Then they throw to Joe Rogan with the call: “Our first bout tonight features The Gator vs. Satan. In this corner, a slimy, dead-eyed, reptilian killer. In the other corner, an Alligator. Let’s get ready to rummmmbllll— YOW! Ouch. The gator just took off Satan’s right arm. That’s going to be a problem for him, since he’s a rightie, and his right cross is his best mov— GAH! There goes the left arm. And…down goes Satan! Down goes Satan!!”
Bullet Points:
** Nearly 300lbs of meth disguised as solar panels were seized by CBP officers at LAX. The shipment, headed for New Zealand, was flagged based on prior intel and intercepted before export.
** President Trump’s DOJ is now asking for Pennsylvania, Alaska, Arizona, Colorado, Minnesota, Nevada, New Hampshire, New York, and Wisconsin to hand over all election information, including complete voter rolls, data on moved or inactive voters, and details on how rolls are maintained.
** “I’d put my foot in your ass if your head wasn’t in the way.” – Col. Chesty Puller, USMC
** (h/t Claudio via StrategyPage) Both China and Taiwan have corruption issues. **This makes it difficult for either country to keep secrets, such as plans to attack or defend against hostile activities. ** China has allegedly corrupted Taiwanese security personnel, as well as senior officers. The infiltration extends to security agencies, including the National Defense intelligence section. Military personnel are also at fault. Active-duty and retired personnel with access to classified information were compromised.
That is how Taiwan monitors the extent to which China has infiltrated or hired Taiwanese gangsters and businessmen to back Chinese efforts. The criminals are motivated by the desire for financial gain. Taiwanese businessmen are collaborating to maintain their business interests in both China and Taiwan. Smugglers are another source of information. Tens of thousands of ships dock at Taiwanese ports each year. This is how China could bring in explosives, electronics, and drones to be used to thwart efforts to defend the island against attack.
Chinese firms that own numerous enterprises in Taiwan don’t want a war and support efforts to avoid one. Chinese entrepreneurs have far more to lose than their Taiwanese counterparts. A primary goal of a Chinese attack would be to target senior government officials. The infiltration of personnel simplifies this.
China has not given up on seizing Taiwan, but it needs a plan with a high probability of success. A recent Israeli military operation against Iran provided some inspiration. Upon closer examination, it became apparent that China lacked several of the essential abilities Israel employed to make its plan effective. The most critical factor in Israel’s success was experience. China has not fought a war since 1979, when it battled veteran Vietnamese soldiers in a brief border conflict. China lost initially but later claimed they had prevailed when they warned Vietnam that they might use air strikes and a naval blockade if the Vietnamese did not let Chinese forces withdraw more or less peacefully. Not only did Israel have more experience, but it had developed a network of over a hundred intelligence and sabotage operatives inside Iran. Most of these were Iranians hostile to the current religious government. China has no such network in Taiwan, but both China and Taiwan have intelligence operatives in enemy territory. Both are also hobbled by corruption within the military and government.
** The Trump administration is reportedly offering former ICE agents “reinlistment” bonuses of up to $50,000 if they come back to the agency. Many ICE agents and officers left the organization during the chaos of the prior administration.
CDRSAL: The Nuclear Priesthood Augers the Future
(More here) The entire article is worth reading.
Our present Triad? Let’s be blunt about what our inheritance is in 2025.
ICBM: The Minuteman III Intercontinental Ballistic Missiles are as geriatric in theory as their support systems are in practice. Its replacement, the Sentinel, is not shockingly late and overbudget.
SSBN: Heck, I’ve been warning of this problem since 2010, but our youngest Ohio Class SSBN is 28 years old. The oldest four were converted to SSGN, leaving 14 SSBN. Its replacement, the dozen Columbia Class SSBN, besides having 4 fewer missiles as it was designed during a different strategic situation, is expected to be ready in 2031.
Bombers: On a good day, we might have a dozen fully mission-capable B-2 bombers. Probably less. The B-1 bombers are conventional only, and the B-52 cannot survive anywhere near contested air—relegated to stand off nuclear weapons and/or suicide missions.
Of course, we also have nuclear gravity bombs that TACAIR fighters like the F-35 can carry. In 2025, they are the atomic equivalent of the bayonet. If you have to use it, you are in trouble.
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We can sundown our nuclear ICBM with no impact on strategic defense. As a pleasant side effect, we could move on to the more useful and needed conventional ballistic missile arena without other powers wondering if we launch one if it has a nuclear warhead.
SSBN: The Ohio can, in theory, carry 20 SLBM (though built to carry 24), and the Columbia 16. They can have a MIRV’d warhead. Once underway, they are the most survivable part of the present Triad, and they are just as accurate as an ICBM. We can, and should, build more to cover the targeting gap left by the ICBM force. Create a Flight II Columbia Class that can carry 20 missiles if that is what is needed. We can get that additional funding from the decommissioning of the obsolete ICBM force.
Bombers: These are the most useful of the deterrence forces as they are dual-use. With the B-21 ready for serial production, we should build significantly more of them than we initially planned. As we learned (again) earlier this month, they don’t have to wait for the end of the world to be used. They are a solid investment due to their flexibility more than anything else. Let’s make sure the nuclear-armed AGM-181A Long-Range Standoff cruise missile is a success as well.
Others:
- Gravity Bombs: As outlined above, like the bayonet, they have a use or two, but should not be relied on as a primary tool
- SLCM-N: I’ve made my feelings about SLCM-N known last October. I won’t repeat them here. Executive Summary: not just no, he11 no.
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The USAF would hang onto those Minuteman ICBMs as if for dear life, but CDRSAL has it right. They could give the missile crews seats in the new B-21s. They’re monuments to the Cold War. As previously mentioned on VM, the B-21 manned platform is designed to control and manage the battlespace around it by utilizing various drone platforms for electronic warfare, delivering ordnance, or addressing other specialized situations. The same will be true of the USAF Sixth Generation fighter. In this way, a strike package might only incorporate one or two B-21s, even though the delivery system airborne could be twenty or more separate unmanned aircraft.
Identify the Aircraft
1
2
Identify the Armor
3
4
End
1 is Mitsubishi J2M with post war markings for flight tests.
Alligators- 13 feet and 1000 pounds would be a runt in Australia. Salt water crocodiles can be 20 feet and 3 300 pounds. The record (shot for skin) is 28.2 feet.
Maybe you can borrow some?
A few crocodiles have been discovered in the Everglades – or so I’m informed. For some reason they never took hold the way other invasive species like iguanas and pythons did. I have no idea why.
There is a resident croc at Black Point Marina in Miami .
There are an estimated 2,000 saltwater croc’s in Florida. Mostly in the southern everglades bordering the Gulf of America, Florida Bay & also in the upper keys. They have eaten pets in the Key’s after snatching them off of a dock.
We them every time we are fishing around Flamingo in the everglades. I have to admit it’s more than a little disconcerting to pass them or have them pass us while fishing out of a 18′ flats boat!
Those things are nasty prehistoric creatures for sure, okay to view from a distance, from an elevated and fenced position. First time ever seeing one in the wild I got the preferred transpo of an airboat…. flat and wide, not easily tipped, and some decent underfoot real estate to avoid ending up in the brackish water as one of those things dinner.
The saltwater crocs have been reported up here, near the Kennedy Space Center, and Sebastian Inlet area (for those who know). Resident vs. just here in the summer? I’ve never seen anything about that.
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An interesting idea for Alligator Alcatraz would be to make sure the swamp around the place is kind of permanently chummed. Leave some meat around there to make sure there’s always a few more gators around it looking for easy food.
Now that’s an excellent idea…gonna need a bigger moat tho. (but heck, eating at Joani’s Blue Crab Cafe’ in Ochopee, the croc’s were right there below the open air covered deck…added a little something extra to what was a great meal.
Leave the fence security loose.
Encourage a break.
Gators and snakes need to eat. I’ve heard that a python eats 200 animals to get to 10 feet in length.
Any national media shill or Democrat whining about this facility – which is brilliant – either doesn’t live in Florida or, if so, lives in a bubble. People spouting off about things they have no idea.
Sound advice!
Those are most likely American Crocodiles which prefer brackish water, while the American Alligator rules the freash water. Niche partioning. Also, probably why Southeast Asian/ Australian Saltwater Crocs would have issues establishing a foothold.
A lot of the crododilians that people like LL above and everyone below are talking about are members of the American Crocodile, and, yes, they are a saltwater/brackish water crocodile. And their habitat is saltwater and brackish water along the southern and southeastern coast of Florida, though they have spread northwestwardly and farther northeastwardly.
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They (most of them) are native American crocs.
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Though there are some buttheads that have released Australian saltwater crocs, but most crocs in Florida, as I said before, are native American crocs. Gotta stress this, yes, a native population of crocodiles. Because people don’t believe there are native crocs in Florida. But there are.
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Besides the native American Crocodiles and the rare Australian saltie, there are also some Nile crocodiles. Because other buttheads released them, probably when said NCs got too damn large/dangerous/both. Because people are buttheads.
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And… there’s also some South American Kaman here loose in South Florida. Which are crocodilians. Because even more buttheads. Dumb motherhumping buttheads.
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There’s enough native ‘exotics’ here in Florida that will kill you that we didn’t/haven’t/don’t need to import more exotic species not from Florida.
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Really hate buttheads. Especially since a lot of them are jerks that came here from other states and then became what the media call “Florida Man” and really aren’t, more likely “Jersey Man” or “Newyawk Man” or some derivation of some damned blue-controlled Yankee state.
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It, the crocodile issues, are very complex.
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As to size, the American croc is mean enough at 10ft that we here in Florida don’t want monster Saltie- or Nile-sized monstrosities roaming around. Bad enough to hit a 6′ alligator (which are only found natively in North America) or a 10′ python with your car, let alone a motorcycle. Anything larger can do damage to a friggin semi.
Not that it matters, but there is a Chinese Alligator and the Caimans are Alligatorids also.
Is called “arrigatah”. Say it light!
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Alligator is like Lululemon — both are difficult to pronounce for East Asians. Lululemon deliberately so.
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Temu alligator: only 25% the price of an American alligator. Free shipping with five or more. Additional 1% discount with e-coupon. In stock in American warehouse now: no Trump tariff!
It rooks rike your Temu price arreadee have the tarriff adjustment, formarree onree 10% of American Arrigatah price: by weight.
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The adult male American alligators measure 3.4 to 4.5 m (11.2 to 14.8 ft) in length, and can weigh up to 500 kg (1,100 lb),.
The Chinese alligator grows to 1.5–2.1 metres (5–7 ft) in length and weighs 36–45 kilograms (80–100 lb) as an adult.
Identify the Aircraft:
1. Mitsubishi J2M ‘Jack’
2. Douglas A-26B Invader
Identify the Armor:
3. AMX-10RC
4. M10 tank destroyer
Excellent!
AA (the new version): It’s brilliant, used an existing location, and anyone who thinks stepping off into the swamp muck deserves to be allowed to traverse at will. No thanks, too many “things” in those waters that can take you out, make you suffer in death (which is an added bonus to AA iffn one of these scumbags manages to escape).
As for Democrats demanding the release and ‘due process’ for these [minimally] criminal illegals (reminder for those less educated – The Left and half the Liberals- entering in this country without permission is a felony)…it is obvious the Dems hate America and hate WTP, any excuse made otherwise is bogus obfuscation. (Similar to Obama now trying to paint over his coup attempt, what a maroon. Yer toast pal…no wonder Big Mike is hinting at a divorce.)
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State Election Data: Gee, maybe Tina Peters will finally gain some justice after Griswold’s lawfare against her…needs full restitution while Griswold et al should face prison for being an obvious Dem operative…oh, and like any hunter who was charged with doing wrong, have ALL her assets seized. Turnabout is fair play.
Griswold’s lawfare
You are questioning the integrity of our next Governor?
No kidding (but not funny)…she IS being groomed, but has been suspiciously quiet in the past 6 months. Like Nuland, Griswold has also gotten uglier since being part of The Swamp Operation…like a dead fish, evil rots from the inside out and head down.
Wait! Is she a lesbian too? Dang, a total shoo-in for Colorado Governor.
😒
Griswald is married and has children. At least one born while she is on her second term. Her husband appears to be a biological male.
Poor guy. (kidding…sort of…but I hold no quarter for that woman who tried to [illegally] cancel my vote [at least filling in the bubble that is], and who continues to persecute Ms. Peters, or, Jack Phillips for not baking an offensive [to him] cake in a private shop (she has yet to let it go).
Regardless of alligators, trying to cross any marshland on foot is an insane effort. The ground won’t support the weight of a human, mosquitoes will cover every inch of exposed skin at night, constant immersion in the water will lead to all types of nasty infections, and if an alligator does happen to have you for dinner, it’s probably to feast on your bloated corpse. The soggy heat is enough to kill you in Florida. Trying to escape without at least a gallon of water for each day is a guarantee of death.
Maybe they’ll stay in the air conditioned splendor of the facility. But what fun is that?
Sage advice Jess, my observation as well.
LL, and don’t forget the short-term detainees having to use the toilet AND brush their teeth within close proximity because of those – GASP! – “gross and unusual” prison wash units. Somehow every – never been inside a prison before – MSM and Dem shill believed these standard wash units were “3rd world level punishment”, foisted upon these “nice upstanding” detainees…who were caught in the ‘illegally here’ net by those Gestapo ICE agents [doing their job].
My take on Alligator Alcatraz, it’s in the middle of the Everglades, which are nowhere near as bad as most any central or south American swamp or jungle, which said illegals made it through.
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The Everglades aren’t that bad. Lots of dry land, not a lot of floating islands, decent waters. Sure, there’s gators and sharks and snakes, but nowhere near as bad as what people make it out to be. Geez, go watch some shows on catching snakes in the ‘Glades and you’ll see it’s not as bad as people make it out to be.
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What is dangerous are the guards who will shoot to kill, the razor wire and the very unfriendly native bubba Floridians in that area.
Sidebar (per LL’s Bulletpoint yesterday): Thought this fully showcased the level of demented tone-deafness on the Left: “‘The View’ host Sunny Hostin warns Colbert cancellation could lead to the ‘dismantling of our Constitution’
– As if the prior 4 years weren’t? Jailing people for standing up against pedophile-grade School Boards, people getting fired for NOT taking an experimental injection, people FORCED to take the jab, Lawfare used against a Presidential candidate…etc, etc…THAT’s not unraveling the Constitution?
Obviously when one considers the mouthpiece in the headline…”asinine” does come to mind, so does ‘demented’..so does “brainless”. Yet, these people believe their “business” is untouchable and should be funded regardless of outcome because of their version of “the greater good” [of propaganda], as if a charity and not a corporate profit-center enterprise. I supposed Ms. Hostin believes losing $40M per year on a show that had the lowest of all late night ratings is acceptable and should continue, proving – once again – The Left is Communist, and – I believe – fully unaware of their idiotic bent (assumption based on action). These people are beyond warped.
I’d like to add ~guided Rods from God to your defense ‘triad’.
They’re needed.
B-21. More and more, drone operators will be airborne in the world’s most sophisticated flying game consoles.
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Maxine’s wig. I suggest somebody come up behind and light it on fire. We could have a pool on how long it takes her to notice.
X2
I’ll offer a handy pine 2×4 to beat out the flames in Maxxie’s Wig…
I would have thought that double-growth hickory would be more robust.
Why waste such a fine piece of hickory? As hard-headed as she seems, you may ruin the hickory rather than put out the flames.
We could always just use an axe (a fire axe).
Maxine’s wig: Not fire. Someone could get hurt. Instead, I propose that at any press conference she holds, at least a dozen people show up wearing identical wigs. Or better yet, PUT ON the wigs while cameras are panning the crowd.
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Same goes for Brigitte Macron. Only the Brigitte-wig wearers also need to wear tight pants (light colored or white) with a kielbasa stuffed down the front.
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If cornered and interviewed by the (lügen)presse, state that you’re doing it out of admiration for Waters, or Brigitte, as the case may be. Nothing else. If detained by “authorities” then wearing a bad wig and walking around with a Polish sausage in your pants is a Fetish and thus a Protected Sexual Orientation.
Nice visuals Mike…as usual these will be stuck in my brain for a few hours.
wearing a bad wig and walking around with a Polish sausage in your pants
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Everyone you meet in San Francisco or Portland(ia).
SSBN:
A granddaughter’s fiancee is on the SSBN Pennsylvania, still in Bremerton. The hope is September for sea trials. So much for readiness.
I’m sure that it will be ready eventually.
Entered dry dock 3/23 for a scheduled 18 month refit.
Close enough for government work.
I had to snicker about all this Alligator Alcatraz business. I suspect it may not work for everyone. A buddy in Acadiana (that’s the Cajun part of Louisiana for you uneducated Yankee readers) recently had a sizable gator crawl into the conveyor tunnel under his rice storage bins. What’d ya do? I asked him. Oh, we got him out, he said, and went on to say then they ate him. Didja call the game warden, I asked. He snorted and asked, what for?
Boiled or frikasee’d
A bit off topic and late to the game, but wanted share this. First found it over at Kim’s place, “Splendid Isolation”.
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https://x.com/MorosKostas/status/1946466163678204371
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I’m gonna go out on a limb and say the quiet part. This was a premeditated setup.
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Well played, Mr. Ryan.
I saw that elsewhere – well played indeed.