Canadian Stimulus

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A Canadian friend called me on the telephone this morning and mentioned to me that the Canadians were expecting to receive stimulus checks because they didn’t want to be out-done by the US.

I asked him what the stimulus payment was – precisely. He said it was money that the government was sending to taxpayers.
I asked where the government got the money from. He thought about it and said, “from the taxpayers”.
“So the government is giving me back my own money…” It started to sink in. I reminded him that the government was only giving back a very small part of the money he paid in to them.
He said that the money would be used by Canadians to stimulate the economy. Canadians would buy new high-definition television sets, for example.
I pointed out that would stimulate the Chinese economy.
He e-mailed me a message this afternoon after thinking about his stimulus.
  • If you spend stimulus money at Wal-Mart the money goes to China.
  • If you spend it on gasoline, it goes to the Arabs.
  • If you buy a computer, the stimulus money goes to India.
  • The fruits and vegetables he buys in Canada are produced in Mexico.
  • Spending stimulus money on a new car sends the cash to Japan.
  • Buying useless crap sends money to Taiwan
  • And if he pays off his credit cards, it will go toward management bonuses and they’ll hide the money off shore.
If he kept the money in Canada, the only place he could spend it would be:
  • Yard sales.
  • Ball games.
  • Prostitutes.
  • Beer.
  • Tattoos.
Since those appear to be the only Canadian businesses left in Canada. I told him it sounded like the US, except we still make firearms and ammunition – well we do, but it’s bought up before it hits the shelves, so in the US we’d be back to yard sales, etc. just like our Canadian cousins.
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